Day 250 Party Hardy

The Baby holds up the penis-cake molds, scrutinizing, "Isn't it kind of small?"


I snort, "That's what she said."


"Becky, turn it on," the Baby laughs, gesturing to Becky in the passenger seat of my car. "Make 'em bigger!"


We laugh and double-back to Becky's house where we stir up the batters; me with vanilla, Becky with strawberry, and the Baby with chocolate. Becky's mommy watches Supernatural Encounters in the living room and seems pretty chill about the idea that we're making genitalia-shaped cakes in her kitchen...for a birthday...for a boy. We pop the penis platters into the oven and get started on the spaghetti and meatballs Becky's mom set out for us. 

My mom never understood the concept of actual meatballs growing up, so it's a fun little treat for my sister and I to have fluffy, meaty balls to eat. At the end of the cooking time, the Baby's chocolate penises are a little too juicy and jiggle and super undercooked, so we pop them back in and get started on getting ready to go out. Later, when the cakes have been cooled and we're all dolled up, we ensue in innuendo-loaded frosting of said penises.


"Damn," The Baby moans, squeezing out icing into strategic places. "I'm running out."


"It's because he's done it so much." Becky's mom laughs. "He's getting tired!"


The Baby laughs and they high-five over a sex-joke.


We haul our stash over to Kai's house and I'm initially appalled that Cue's 5-year-old nephew is there and hold the tray over my head so that I'm not known as the lady brining edible penises over. We pass on the wine, beer, and rum (representative of each of the alcoholic food groups) and pop open a bottle and get started. 


Flashforward a few hours later and everyone's getting a little too attached to the karaoke machine (the Baby does a rendition of Ä Whole New World with Elliot) and Ken's brought over a hookah and it's the most smoking that I've done since I've gotten employed. It's chill and happy and there's so much shit-talking that we could fill a public restroom. Overall: success.