Day 202 Epiphany

I've always said that I don't see the point in having a big, grandiose wedding. 

I had a debut a few years ago and the stress alone of the entire endeavor made me want to shoot myself through the face at least four times over. So it's understandable that the idea of having a wedding (on one magical day that'll likely happen after the apocalypse) turns me off. 


It wasn't until very recently, though, that I finally realized the root of my reasoning. See, weddings are events, commercialized celebrations akin to birthdays and New Year's, conducted for the sake of public appearances and creating the opportunity for photos to be taken. When I've told people my non-plans for a wedding, they've scoffed, saying, "You're going to regret not having one."


And it annoyed me, because, really, why would you regret it? Because you didn't have pictures of the day? Because you didn't spend a few grand on the dress, the church, and reception? Because you didn't call up relatives you haven't heard from since you were 10 and met people from your fiance's side that they haven't seen since they were 5 and will likely have no influence or presence in your marriage life? 


Apparently, yes.


After years of hating the idea of weddings, I've gotten down to the root of my reasoning: weddings are an investment in a marriage... and I just don't have much faith in my own ability to find a spouse who'd stick through a marriage with me. When I got down to the nitty-gritty, I figured that there's a lot of money and effort that goes into a wedding, and like everything else that you put a lot of money and effort into, be it relationships, college, or working out, you expect a payoff: free sex, more figures in your annual income, or a set of 6-pack abs. 

I'm glad it's okay to objectify men now

But with marriage, you don't ever really get to the point of thinking, "Ah, this is what it was for" since marriage, by definition, is [supposed to be] a perpetual process, wherein you get eternal progress reports instead of a diploma. And that's a long time to keep trying...